Memory quilt

Our son Andrew went missing on 14th September 2007.  My quilt square is made from his school blazer and badge, the last thing I ever saw him wearing as he said "See you later" on his way out of the front door that morning. The rock band patches reflect his musical taste and were taken from a jacket he wore; his sister Charlotte stitched them onto the jacket for him as a birthday gift.  Andrew returned to our house that day instead of going to school and took his favourite bag, to which Charlotte had sewn similar badges.  The shoulder strap can be seen in the last image we have of Andrew leaving Kings Cross Station.  It reminds me of the thoughtfulness and care within our family and that our daughter lost a best friend as much as a younger brother. The oak tree is present because Andrew and I once planted some acorns in a large tub.  These oak saplings have now been distributed to a close friend that rescued me when Andrew's disappearance led to my attempted suicide, to our daughter and to Andrew's old Primary school in our street.  The last is the centrepiece of our front garden and I am reminded of him each time I enter and leave the house. The stones reflect a shared interest and hobby.  Andrew collected rocks and minerals; seen here in the case I helped him make to display some of them.  He also polished rough rock in a tumbling machine.  It was our habit to do this on a Sunday afternoon together.  I remember turning the machine off thinking he would be back and we would work on it together then.  The lack of the background sound of the tumbling rocks seemed strange at first.  It was two or three years I think before I decided to finish the batch he was working on and I have continued the hobby ever since as something which reminds me of times we shared together. Finally, I was going to stitch "missing since..." in the centre of the square when it occurred to me that being missing means too that you are missed. Missed so much, by so many people, for so long.

I have chosen to depict a snooker table, as Andrew and I would play each other on those occasions when he visited the family in Doncaster. Andrew usually won! His disappearance leaves a gap in our family story.

Steve has been missing since 21st January 2008, it was his 47th Birthday. This blanket square is to remind us of him. The plaid background is because he went missing in Scotland, his favourite place and we shall have him in our hearts forever.

Background My husband John has been missing since 4 November 2004 when he set off for a drive in the car equipped for a walk on the East coast of Yorkshire BUT he did not return home. This was unusual and out of character for a devoted family man who was looking forward to the birth of his first grandchild. We had met 34 years before and had just celebrated 32 years of marriage. A worrier by nature, he did have something on his mind which he told me was “making him feel ill".  It has been thought by all concerned that he may have had an accidental slip on the coast path as a result of the "onset of ill health".  He has not been found and the constant "not knowing" exactly what happened, never goes away. The Square The dark blue background is made from one of Johns shirts. A few things have been sewn on and embroidered to reflect some of the interests in his life. Top left is his School badge. Another badge I found is the White Rose of Yorkshire where we were born and lived and where John was last seen on the coast of Flamborough Head. Work logo - John worked all his life at British Steel Rotherham as an electronic engineer. Interests and hobbies - there are many but I have just picked a couple to show his love of football (our local team in Sheffield) and walking (woodland, moors and coast). There are so many aspects of John's life I could have illustrated but was restricted by space and availability of items to use. My Experience Over the last few years I have had to make difficult decisions - what shall I do with my husband’s clothing and possessions? I had an idea to use some of his shirts to make a memory quilt which we would remember him by. When the Missing People charity made it known that they wanted to collate memory squares to make a quilted hanging I was immediately inspired. This was the push I needed to do something useful with all those shirts. (He had a lot !) I picked one out for the background, then hunted around for what I'd got to attach to the square which would reflect John's life. A couple of badges a football cap and T shirts with suitable emblems on which I cut out. The easy bit was attaching these items using the sewing machine. The difficult bit for me was hand sewing the writing of his name and dates and I kept putting that bit off until I made myself sit down one January day to get on with it. Taking everything into consideration, this has been a very therapeutic exercise and it spurred me on to start and complete my original project of a bed quilt. I have an item to keep close to me and Missing People have one to put with others as a reminder of the many families who live with the heartache of not knowing what has happened to a loved one. I hope many people get the opportunity to view the finished item to raise awareness of a situation which is life changing and unimaginable until it affects you.

My son Quentin ent missing from the family home in New Zealand in 1992, he was 18 years old. For the last 25 years, we have searched in every way possible to try and find out what happened to him. A Coroner's Inquest in 2014 concluded he had  'in all probability' committed suicide but I have resisted that verdict, no body - no proof. In 2015, I was sent information via my Facebook group for Quentin from an old school friend saying she had been told years ago that he had been accidentally killed. It's now my mission to find out conclusively if this is how he died.  I still feel the loss, still miss him every day and still search for answers to all our questions. This quilt square has taken me nearly 2 years to complete, something was holding me back and I couldn't decide on my design or materials, but now I look at the finished square and feel satisfied with its special significance. I have cut out a panel from an old and faded Greenpeace t-shirt which Quentin loved and wore constantly; he was a keen supporter of the organisation and loved the natural environment which surrounded our house in West Auckland. His main hobby from the age of 11 was beekeeping - hence the small bees stitched into the letter Q. The ribbons with HOPE written on come from a Missing People Family Day in 2016, which had Hope as the theme for our workshops. I have left the end ragged and unravelling for such is my hope. Similarly, the ends of embroidery thread left hanging somehow speak of the endless threads of information we have followed over the years. Stitching this quilt, and finally finishing it, has been cathartic; it speaks to me of Quentin in many small but significant ways. I am pleased and proud to know it will be sewn into the Missing People quilt, on display with other squares dedicated to missing loved ones. showing a small part of our combined emotional journeys.

My wonderful husband, soul mate and best friend, David went missing in the Alpes Maritimes in France on August 2nd 2016. I decided to make this quilt square after the 2018 family day. I do not like sewing despite the fact that I am an artist, however, the making of this square gave me comfort and was a great pleasure. It was a loving gift to Dave. The square is hand sewn in bright colours. We lived a colourful life together as anybody who has visited our home and who knew us as a couple will know. It shows an image of the mountains in France that Dave loved so much. We inherited a house in the small mountain village of Marie in 2012, and since that time we had spent our summers there living and working in our second home for two to three months at a time. The blue running down through the centre of the square is a stream (Le courant de la médecine), which runs down from the mountains to the River Tinée below, it is by this stream he was last seen. He went missing in the hot mid-day sun on a walk between two villages. After his disappearance, my two sons, my niece and myself were being gently comforted by the couple who were the last to see David, when a yellow butterfly flew in through an open window, slowly circled around all our heads, then flew quietly out through the open door. It was a powerful moment, after which we were surrounded by yellow butterflies. Dave’s disappearance remains a mystery. He was blissfully happy that day, we both were. Despite extensive searches by mountain rescue, helicopter, sniffer dogs, abseilers and my extraordinary family, no sign has ever been found.

My square was made as a tribute to a dear friend, Dave Wood, who went missing in the Alpes, Maritimes on the 2nd August 2016.  At the centre of the square in the village of Marie, where Dave shared a much-loved second home with his wife Val. The map shows the footpaths, rivers, roads and mountains surrounding the village. From here, Dave went walking on the day he was last seen. The map is surrounded by butterflies, which have become a symbol of Dave and his exuberant, colourful personality, for those who knew and loved him. I have used Kantha embroidery to reflect Val and Dave's travels in India. The border of the square represent the mountains of the Alpes Maritimes, changing colour through the seasons, but ultimately unchanging, closely guarding their secrets.